My heart, pounding in my chest,
     makes the wrest of me uneasy.
The hairs on the back of my neck
  stand at attention.
        My soul, feels invisible eye
         peirce my flesh.
Someone unseen stares into my soul.
  They wait to find my weakest point.
    Then they wil strike.
    They will rip me apart,
thinking,
  that I won't stand a chance.
       But they don't know.
I've already gone.
     So that they won't have the chance.
  If I end it all,
    then they can't.

Perhaps I'm already gone,
  maybe it's already over.
What shall I do now?
   Shall I go on,
    shallow and lifeless?
   Or should I start anoew,
    and trust them more this time?
I've heard they can hurt me.
I've heard they can help me.
   I've learned to to trust.
    to always be on edge.
But, then,
   what I've learned has yet to do good.
what I've learned is only a hinderance.

My life, feels like,
   it's been waisted.
Learning these lessons which,
now, are not but obsticles.
    
I am scared.
  I am exhausted.
    I am,
      for the first time,
               truly helpless.